oh im so flattered! i was browsing people's websites, and also aveda!!!'s website.. looking for good ideas. i like avedas! it's got a clean, classy, elegant look.. i saw that my website is a link on rebi's page, and also ben kim's. oh boy- all the more pressure to make mine better...! which i will do now... before i study for circuits tonight. =)

good morning! wow it's early. i feel good. i feel a little hungry. i should go run! after i write a little. last night i went out with jess and ivy. we went to hollywood video to rent Life As A House, and then Baskin Robbins for ice cream ( i got very bery strawberry) and then McDonald's for Jess's dinner. We went to watch the movie at Ivy's house. Ivy had her wisdom teeth pulled, so she's still in some pain. I hope she feels better soon! It was so good to see them, be with them. i think jess and i mesh well together, we are always joking with one another, and teasing.

i woke up super early, probably around 5 am. it is grandma's last day... mommy is going with her to taiwan..for a week. i will miss grandma! she has been with me since, around middle school. i told her to come back for my wedding! she said, of course! i want to buy her something to leave with, but i feel that i want to make good money before getting her something real nice.

try as i may.

i wish i could be more focused. ive been trying to learn dreamweaver... learning how to make dynamic webpages, extracting information from a database.. and figuring out the OBDC stuff. but i've just been reading bits and pieces, i haven't really put anything together yet. in addition, i know nothing about databases- all of a sudden, i have to learn ColdFusion...? i know they have made doing all this 10 times easier, but still, i have to sift through everything once first.... too much information? this is what makes being a computer engineer so interesting and at the same time so disheartening. there is way tooo much to learn.

i know google is hiring, i took a look at the page, it looks like SO MUCH FUN! i really want to become specialized.. this undergrad education is not where my passion is i think. i guess because there is so much stuff, i have to figure out what path to take.. and become good at it. (ColdFusion is still downloading.. =) )

i like fridays because there is no class, but i have to stay late because of janitorial duties. =) so. what is in store for the weekend? (1) book flight for going back to school- arrange living with Karen, arrange getting ride from Harlena (2) seeing Jessica tonight! (3) see Ivy later this weekend? (4) studying electric circuits! (5) confirming plans with Jennifer for next weekend, i think we should do dinner.. her and daniel, me and .. who do i bring? (5) i need to RUN.

ive been thinking about clothes too much. but, really i need a beautiful body- then whatever i put on looks good right? even if it's like an orange shirt and polka dot pants. haha. so i need to RUN and get toned... by the time summer is out. =)

i am a little distressed. i can hear grandma and mommy talking.. the trip was quite good~ but we are back and we do not forget that now we have the business of getting grandma back to taiwan. this is a lesson to myself to always keep family relations good... and don't marry a man with a poor temper. i can't deal with fighting and arguments! also.. i am a little tired from driving, and the thought of having to go to class tonight.

i have been listening to the same winamp list, and on the trip i listened to my burned CDs over and over. i want something fresh! i think for different moods i have different music. everyone does right? there was a period when i was into rock and alternative, then i remember a time i downloaded a lot of chinese stuff, then i know in high school i listened to jars of clay, collective soul and stuff that was less mainstream.

i heard this song while I was at Gap yesterday- it was one I listened to a LOT early sophomore year. I remember sharing it with Christina. I keep thinking that it's Edwin Mccain or Collective Soul, and ive been looking for the past half hour.. what is it called? it's so pretty. =)

it's been a good day. i spent the day taking mommy and grandma to downtown san diego- making our way to coronado bridge and walking by the sea and then horton plaza in downtown. the weather was perfect, as usual. =) not too hot, with a little breeze from the ocean. we did this in the morning when esther was in lab. then at around noon we went to pick her up. we came back for lunch and then at around 2:30, headed to mexico. mexico! we drove in, and then immediately drove out.. the place is a little ghetto.. when we were waiting to get back into the States, random men would wipe our windows for any money... children would sell candy. !!

we talked in the afternoon, relaxed a little back in esther's apartment and then went to la jolla shores to see the beach! and then 168 by ranch 99 for dinner. a bit of taiwanese cuisine. it was good food. =)

so the trip is over.. tomorrow at 6 am we are going back. i must shower now. i have lots of thoughts, but the setting isn't quite the best for writing. so! with further adieu.. good night.!

im in san diego. =) mommy, grandma, esther, me. it's been a good day. i'm happy, it seems like grandma is having a lot of fun! we are planning to go to mexico tomorrow. =) woohoo. she really needs a good break. they've also decided that esther will send grandma back early september.. to taiwan! esther will be in taiwan for about 20 days. wow! the plans we make spontaneously. =) i just hope grandma has fun...i hope the next time she comes back is for my wedding.. or esther's wedding. i want my grandma there!

too much family politics. gr. daughters are good to their mothers.. grandpa isn't so nice when he insults daughters~!

sigh. okay. think happy. where is mark? i miss mark.

i had a feeling that mark would call, so i checked my phone in the midst of watching jerry maguire. give up jerry maguire? yes i did. last week i learned about how i can be too pessimistic, pushing the doubt and uncertainty to unnatural levels. we are not even dating yet and we worry about the future and bring up the past. i think we've both realized that. it's like you throw away the present because you live in the past and discount the future. why do that? the happy monday i had last week is coming back.

in these two months plus mark and i have become much better friends. he was my best friend by the standards of he happens to be the one closest relative to to me compared to anyone else i can think of, but by now, he is my best friend by my standards of really sharing with someone, predicting someone's thoughts, be able to see a complete person. we had a good conversation, we laugh and joke a lot. i like to hear him laugh. i know that i always held back from him.. and now im not so afraid anymore, and i want to. yay.

mommy and i talked a little about the passage of time, how the years fly by. she said, just be happy whatever age you are at. it flies. i can honestly say that this has been one of the best summers in terms of learning new things, strengthening friendships, learning about family and relations.

so yay. =)

i had such a good weekend! yesterday i went to fremont to meet up with andrew. we went to this pho place and then took BART to SF, then MUNI to Pacific Bell Park to watch the SF Giants against the Colorado Rockies. two new experiences, taking MUNI and also Pac Bell Park. Our seats were amazing and the weather was perfect-sunny, breezy, not a cloud and we could see the ocean from the ballpark! i learned so much about baseball from andrew! san francisco has so much to offer!

i remember meeting him in orchestra, my first impression was that he was spoiled and a sorta moody kind of guy. single child. it seemed like of all the orchestra people, he seemed the last person i would get to know the best, and continue this day to talk to him. we kept in touch mainly over IM, and somehow i became his "older sister" - especially this last year when he was a freshman at davis. i had a wonderful day with him. times like this, i bite my tongue and tell myself not to judge people so quickly.

i think our friendship/sibling hood has a lot of potential. what is so different is the "sibling" feel to it. i fall into the older sister role.. i try my best to give him my optimism about transfering, doing "better" than his parents, and he asks me about dating too.. yesterday we talked a lot about dating because he's never had a relationship before, and he was asking all my thoughts about it.

i talked to esther and mark yesterday on the phone. i want to tell both of them so much of what i hear about grandma and everything.. it's such a mess! what to do about family relationships... im getting closer to mommy though, through all this.

the big news of today is that i volunteered at the chinese summer festival. it was a good chance to talk to new people also! this one guy thought i was a freshman.. in high school. they all think i look about 17. hee. they are going to be juniors in high school, and im going to be a junior in college. hey! i am SO HAPPY that i look young. also, guys are so shameless! two random guys passing by were so flirtatious...today brought back many memories of high school.

tomorrow i have to learn about PHP! esther our webpage looks so cool! im going to post it for you to see after your exam! good luck!